Friday, February 27, 2009

Self Destructiv

When i wake up tomorrow. I won't eat. I will only drink alcohol.
+I promise I will be as self destructive as possible. I don't want to accomplish anything. i want to drink. smoke. buy weed. not skate. destroy relationships and future friendships. i will hurt everyone i know eventually so why not start tomorrow. ( I feel guilty and scared about what I just wrote, and I dont' want to ruin my life but I am so scared of living. fuck I shouldn't be telling any of you this)

the world

the world seems endless with possiblities... but the soberness is creeping up on me. i wish i could stay in this mind state forever. where i look at everything as a montage, where everything couldve been the best video i've ever made but i was too much of a pussy to bring a camera. i fucking hate my timidness. fuck. fuck. i . . . . . i ....I need to take control of my life. I am hoping that i'm not just wasting away... I hope that I am learning as I go along....